Skip to content

Taking Control

Taking Control

The course of true love never did run smooth

William Shakespeare

In life, love and d/s there are always hiccups. Not every thing can go to plan every single time. In other words, if you think you know what is going on , that is the moment right before you screw it up.

Let me give some context before we get to the meat of the matter. Lillith has been asking me to take more control over aspects of her life. We both like that. She already has some rules around food, she has to send me a picture or description of her meals. This is so I can make sure she is eating well and regularly.

The issue arose when I felt that one of her meals was lacking some protein. I told her to go and eat an egg. She did not take well to that command. The reason why she did doesn’t matter, what does matter is that we did not negotiate that level of control over her food habits. That was my mistake and I will be more conscious of those kinds of things in the future.

Shortly after that she asked again about taking more control and I obviously told her that I would like to have approval over what she eats and tell her if I think it should be modified. Now things have been busy for me with moving to a new house and so we both went off to think about that. I will only write from my perspective since her view is hers to tell. But suffice it to say that she request some insight into how I saw that working. So here it is, my plan for taking control of her food intake, subject to negotiation of course.

I want her to tell me what she wants to eat for each meal of the day before she makes it so that I can reviews, approve, or change it. If she wished to make a meal plan for the week and submit that ahead of time that would be just fine with me too. There are of course lots of exceptions for local life when it would not be practical for me to be able to provide guidance. For example if she went to a friends house for dinner, or a meeting that had food she can’t request a specific meal, that would just be silly.

In those cases she would only have to tell me what she is having or send me a picture just as we do now. Now I am not a micro manager type of guy. Chances are that in most circumstances what she chooses will probably just fine with me. But I want to her to concentrate on two things here. Thing 1: That she plans meals for herself and not just have whatever she has made for other people. Thing 2: To think about what she is eating and whether it is caring for herself in the best way possible. After all she does belong to me and I want to see her take the best care of herself.

I offered a week trial to make sure that this would work for the both of us and that is why we are doing what we do. For us. I know that we will have many more discussions on this topic and a million other things about taking more control of her life as we both wish. But as li=long as we do it together even the things that don’t work are not a failure, just something that we have found that we didn’t enjoy.

I look forward to taking control of as many aspects of her life as she and I can manage and learning what is right for us. But at the end of the day as long as we work together though the things we get wrong and love that we tried them just as much as the things we get right then we will be just fine. And if the course of true love (or d/s) doesn’t run smooth. Well, we will just enjoy the bumps along the way.


  1. Before you make any meal for yourself including a packed lunch you will tell me what you wish to make.
  2. No pre approval for healthy snacks.
  3. Crisps or icecream or candy requests require approval

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *