There is a moment coming soon. Something unexpected but very desired. A moment when things will come together in a single place and time. Where questions that have been asked will be answered, and the truth of things will be made clear. Or not.
I know what I believe will happen, that the connection that up to now only exists at a distance will become a connection made more intense will crystallize into something more.
All of this has been surprising to me. You think you know how life will go and whoops, here is a curveball. As someone reminded me recently “For man proposes, but God disposes” now most of you know how I feel about god and religion, but there are some useful words from those sources. After the year that has been so far I was panning for a long stretch of time as a Dom without a sub. But fate or serendipity had other plans and as part of my new resolve to not be closed off to new ways and new experience I just felt that not giving this a try was a mistake. I know that she feels the same. There are many obstacles that could derail everything and we are fully aware of them. But what we have so far is very powerful and that is rare. I have had that before, twice. One I wrecked and the other hangs by a thread and the outcome is very doubtful. I am trying what I can and it is still important to me. In the meantime I have encountered someone who fits with me and I with her. Passing up this moment would be yet another mistake and I won’t do that anymore.
So in just about 9 days we will take the plunge and know for sure that which we suspect is the case. That what we have has meaning and importance and that our lives are better for having each other in it. We have much to do and a very short time to do it in. But we will use every moment that we have to explore as much as possible and find the joy in each of them. Yes, I am nervous, but confident, and she is the same.
Together we find out if we have that little click. And maybe (well I think more than maybe) that click will be followed by another.
Lillith has some words on cravings