Lillith wrote a post about her orgasms. That got me thinking about my orgasms. So like, I think, most everyone else I prefer orgasms with my partner. Not that I don’t have them on my own. The current situation means that they are always on my own. That doesn’t mean that we don’t sext or have phone sex but that isn’t exactly the same.
Now that I am with Lillith I tend not to masturbate very much. It isn’t that I don’t become aroused, she is very very good at turning me on. It is just that I know that while it will feel good and relieve some of the sexual tension it just won’t be enough.
The best orgasms come with all the bits that come before and after. Seeing her, touching her, making her come all prolong the whole experience. My arousal grows with all the things we do. And we do a lot of kinky things. Sometimes my orgasm comes when I know she has no more to give at the moment and then I just use her for my pleasure. That is hot and I know that she is focused only on me and my pleasure.
Other times I try to coordinate my orgasm with hers, because sometimes that is wonderful too. That moment that we both lose control and top over the edge. Brilliant when that happens too.
But sex and bodies are odd things. They don’t do what we want when we want them to no matter what we want. So many things can disrupt that fine line to orgasm, too hot, too cold, too many thoughts in your head. too much of life. I know that I have had my problems with that as well.
The part that is hard to remember is that it doesn’t matter. That a failure of your body is not a failure of you as a person and that is really tricky for all of us no matter what parts we are working with. I know it is hard to remember because when it happened to me and not just that I couldn’t come, but that I couldn’t get an erection I felt like a failure and that is a hard thing.
The path to an orgasm is complicated and that is normal. Like everything else it is a spectrum. There are those who come at the drop of a hat and those who get hard from a stiff breeze, people who can’t come, or get hard or get wet. None of that matters, what matters is the path we take along the way. Where we learn about how our bodies work and how are partners bodies work> I have learned that I like that journey, that exploration. No matter how long it takes to reach orgasm, or even if that is never reached. There is so much fun and joy to be had along the way.
Come with me my little slut.